J is for judy head

Unless you've attended cosmetology school, you're probably wondering what the hell a judy head is. Let me enlighten you...it's a mannequin head that hairdressing students learn to cut, style, colour and perm on, because the first time you ever put a pair of scissors to hair, you really prefer your first victim to be a lifeless head of plastic, as opposed to a live person that can shriek, cry and/or bleed.

Hello, I'm Judy and I will be your most hated companion for the next 10 months

She may look pretty innocuous but trust me when I say this bitch is the bane of every hairdressing student's existance. Her hair is utter crap to work with....it's real human hair, but it's it's often as coarse as horse hair and about as co-operative as a toddler after a 6 pack of Red Bull. This nest of evil wants to tangle, stick straight out and any attempts to wrap it in a perm rod or roller will test your patience to the point of wanting to punch her blank plastic face in. Brushing her out is a nightmare. Cutting her hair dulls the shit out of your scissors. We hate her. It's tradition as well as necessary.

As a hairdressing student 20+ years ago, I did my fair share of cursing Judy straight to hell and even  sometimes kicking her across the room like a hairy soccer ball. As a hairdressing instructor, I feel my students pain and sympathize with their frustraition with the JudyBitch. However, I do realize the benefit in practicing on a manniquin because as I repeat to my students over and over again "If you can do that on a manniquin head, dealing with a real person's hair is a piece of cake". I also remind them that at the end of their course, they can celebrate by running her over with their car, which trust me, is highly satisfactory

Judy Heads earn two out of five flaming middle fingers on the Hate-O-Meter...mostly because as much as I hate Judy, it's really kind of fun to torture my students with her