Wednesday 27 March 2013

Proof that Canadians are secretly assholes

We Canadians have a reputation for being polite and non-confrontational. The rest of the world looks at Canada and thinks "Awwww, Canadians are so damn nice and non-threatening...they're like vanilla pudding in a world of Sriracha Hot Sauce and they would never do anything untoward to their global neighbours"

Think again.

If you're a yoga pants fan (and what woman isn't?), you may have heard the shocking news that because of a batch of too-sheer black yoga pants made by Canadian yogawear company Lululemon, there will be a worldwide black yoga pant shortage, explained here.

It's ok. Take a minute to absorb that and then calm the fuck down.

According to the article, yoga pant pandamonium has begun and people are encouraged to not panic and start yoga pant rationing immediately

What you don't know is this: the yoga pants shortage is a lie. Oh, there's plenty of Lululemon yoga pants...but Canada has decided to hoard them, for no reason other than WE CAN. We are amused by the ensuing yoga pant chaos and are currently reveling in our butt-lifting, stretchy, comfortable glory, while we watch the rest of the world freak out and go pantsless. Some people just want to watch the world burn. In Canada, we prefer to watch the world descend into yoga-pants-shortage madness.

Check. Mate.


  1. Man, those Lululemon pants are freakin' expensive.

  2. This is so funny! I guess I'm safe since I wear blue jeans every day (like a good American, ha ha).

  3. As a fellow Canadian, sometimes it's just nice to sit in the corner and stir the pot.

    .......or, watch the women in their yoga pants. :)

  4. OH MY GOD! Give us our freaking yoga pants, you!

    Love it!

  5. This is the 2nd one I've read recently about the Lulumon yoga pants. I'll take my Target pants anyday.

  6. This is so funny! I don't wear yoga pants often, mostly because I got too fat for the full length pair and the capris that fit are too cold in winter. But I plan to wear the shit out of both of them once I get less fat and the weather warms up. Mine are from Target though, so I don't think they are see through. At least I hope they aren't.

  7. I knew you were evil, but I had no clue you were anxious to see my American sized ass parading around your yard in a precariously small thong. Get your sunglasses ready 'cuz I'm heading to your house to torment you until you release my yoga pants! They're kinda all I can wear now anyways because Japan has made me fat.