Wednesday 14 December 2011

Legolanche on aisle 14

Last night my son wanted to do a bit of Xmas shopping so we popped over to the mall, which I would normally avoid, especially this time of year. The mall we have in town was at one time possibly the shittiest mall in history. That title is rightfully reserved for the mall in Campbell River...that place is like the Ghost of Malls Past...empty as a tomb, dark, depressing and the odd shopper you encounter looks like they stumbled there by accident and are frantically looking for the exit so they can escape before they're infected by Sad Mall cooties. Our local mall has improved with the edition of several new stores but it still has a long ways to go before anyone would rather shop there than make the 1 hour drive to Nanaimo for franchise/chain-store manna (Oh Chapters, I heart you and your fine and massive selection of reading material so much it's probably illegal).

The biggest thing holding our mall back from jumping into "hey this place isn't so bad" territory? Is Zellers. A big box retailer that specializes in The Trifecta of Retail Suckage... shitty customer service, crap quality and  looking like the aftermath of a tornado.

I have yet to enter Zellers thinking "oh look how clean and tidy it is!". Clothes thrown over racks, the bedding department looking as messy as a teenager's bedroom, and walking through the toy department is taking your life into your hands while you wait for the inevitable avalanche of teetering stack of lego boxes to bury you alive. That is when they actually have any lego. Also, the seasonal department looks like Santa just projectile vomited  Xmas all over the aisles in random clumps. Not pleasing to the eye at ALL

I realize Zellers is a big box store and quantity rules over quality but is it necessary to stock stuff that even a homeless person would turn their nose up at? Even the stuff that is made in Canada looks like it came via a Korean sweatshop. Cheap doesn't need to equal fugly ALL the time.

And please send your employees to customer service boot camp like yesterday. There is never anyone in the individual departments to, oh I don't know...provide service and clean up all the clothes throw all over the place? Where the hell are these people anyway? Having dumpster races out back? Running their resumes over to Walmart?? And don't even get me started on the cashiers...does this place purposely hire the most surly, grouchy people on the planet or do they just become that way after working is Zellers Hell (Hellers?? HA!) after a couple weeks. The one time I encountered a non-bitchy person  working the checkout and judging by her demeanor, her meds were working overtime because NO ONE is that freaking happy without chemical intervention, ever. I think she scared me more than the surly employees ever do.

Thankfully, Target has purchased Zellers and ours will be changed over sometime next year and I can only imagine any changes they make will be for the better. Because it seriously cannot get any worse